Dedicated to Mr Tippler

This is the point where I turn into a split personality Big Blogger.

My power and dedication to the cause has come into question, which to be fair I find a little upsetting, mainly because my Mum's always telling me that I'm a sweet little cream cake so I'm not used to criticism, but also because it's just plain WRONG. So you will respect my authoritahhhhhhhhh!

From now on Big Blogger is the power-crazed fiend you always thought he could be. He will rule with an iron fist. He will come down hard on any insolence. He will ban marmite.

See Tippler? You're going to regret you ever started this line of questioning.

The other side of the coin is that I shall from now until further notice (ie. whenever the bloody hell she turns up) assume the mantle of Little Blogger as well. I will be warm, accomodating, and above all really fucking pink. Anything you want you get, within reason obviously. I can't, for example, provide you with the power of Greyskull. I'd love to able to, but I can't. Sorry. Such is life.

So I will be Big and Little. Perhaps I should be referred to as Medium-sized Blogger?

Anyhow, there's important stuff that needs dealing with, so excuse my curtness while I switch into Big mode.

*turns the dial to 'Bastard' on the Evil Scale*

Right you worms!

Here's how this is gonna happen.

I talk loudly and you all stand to attention and listen to what I have to say, right?

Good!!!

Number ONE!
Invader Stu has, as I previously stated but obviously not everyone was listening, been evicted for not completing the Celebrity Anecdote task on time. It's very sad but that's the way it goes. Invader Stu is cordially invited to The Diary Room to say his goodbyes, if he so desires.

Number TWO!
Clare was guilty of getting her task in two hours after the stated deadline today, but apparently had the crap internet blues, so she's excused. Just this once mind. Next time I'm going to need a BT engineers report on the matter to conclusively prove I'm not being buggered around with. So, to clarify, Clare is not evicted.

Number THREE!
Which means that someone else is. That someone, with 23% of the vote, in what has been a very close contest, is Non-working monkey. That was short and sweet wasn't it? Okay, maybe just short, but I'm going to miss you Monkey, even if no-one else will. I like a monkey with attitude and the ability to write a short novel in less than half an hour. So you too can go to The Diary Room and wax eloquent about how wonderful your time in the house has been. That is, unless...

Number FOUR!
Penfold decides to evict someone else instead! Yes, as the outright winner of the public vote (with one measly vote against his name) Penfold Papersurfer can decide, if he so chooses, to keep Non-working monkey in the house and evict ANY OTHER HOUSEMATE. So Penfold, the decision is yours... And I want the answer within the next hour. If I don't get one then the monkey gets the boot.

Number FIVE!
Task 7 will go up tonight. It's a good one, and it's going to last a whole week. Yes, you heard me, A WHOLE WEEK. And from now on, unless unforseen circumstances get in the way, all evictions are to be carried out on Mondays. These are the new rules, and anyone who doesn't like it can quite frankly lump it.

Number SIX!
A poll will be going up soon, but it's all part of the task and will be slightly different to normal so you'll just have to wait and see what I've got in store for you.

That's the shouting over. I'll be back here in one hour (10pm UK time) to see if Penfold has made his decision, then someone will get evicted, and the new task will go up.

See you all soon, with cherries on top.

BB

Comments

[bedshaped]

That was so scary, I think I parped!

[ordinary girl]

Sitting quietly in the corner. Rocking!

Oh, and just about to give Penfold that Deputy PM job... (creep, creep, creep)

[penfold]

Well - thank you mediochre-sized blogger for my 'prize'. I hope you don't take this the wrong way if I firmly refuse your offer of nominating somebody else. I'm afraid I must stick with my long term inmates and side with the public (thereby absolving myself of any form of responsibility). Oh and could someone light a match - bedshaped strayed from the realms of 'parp' and strode boldly into 'guff' territory...

[Medium-sized Blogger]

That's fair enough Mr Penfold. Very fair indeed.

*runs to get his eviction boots on*

[Cat]

Oooh, I love it when you get tough and scold, Medium Sized Blogger!

[bedshaped]

Teehee someone said Guff

[the real bedshaped]

That wasn't me by the way.
That will teach me to post things in here while I'm at my girlfriends house.
Don't worry, she will be repremanded next time I see her.

[ordinary girl]

Oy! Bedshaped has escaped!! Release the dogs...

[Angelalala]

Who needs dogs with MSB in such a vicious mood?!

Sends me all wriggly and moist when he gets like that...

[Daddy Papersurfer]

Penfold with power? - please don't repeat this generosity MSB. You got away with it this time but there have been incidents in the past ....... which ...I'm sorry I...........can't ........... JUST DON'T DO IT AGAIN

[Joseph]

Oooooh heck, this one might be quite tough...

[Tippler]

Marmite banned? Omigod.

Fascist bastard. When I'm prime minister you'll be first against the...er, given a knighthood.

Marmite. Horrible stuff. Excellent decision...