Chivalry is alive and well...

Do not let my appearance deceive you.  I am a very kind person on the inside, honestly, and I am always looking to help people in any way that I can.  However, when looking for the most selfless act I have ever undertaken, I find it hard to pick one from the many gazillions over the years.  So instead I will tell you about the most recent.  In which I helped a damsel in distress.

I will admit that most damsel stories begin with the hero (that is me, for clarification) coming across a crying maiden who at first resists all attempts to help her.  The hero slowly wins her round, and his efforts help her through a traumatic experience of some kind.  That is how it normally happens.  So in this particular case, having a drunk young woman charge at you in a nightclub, might not seem like it has quite the same romantic gravitas.  But that is because you are dead on the inside.  It was very romantic.  If badly lit, and a bit noisy.

It turned out that this particular damsel was in very real danger of being last in the hen night party games, and I for one was not about to let this stunningly attractive helpless lady down.  Like any true gentleman I offered my assistance, in any way I could.

Now, as I stood there, some thirty seconds later, naked from the waist down apart from a pair of socks, and with camera flashes going off around me as if Paris Hilton herself was noshing me off, I began to review my incredibly chivalrous act.  Had I done the right thing?  Yes, I was being photographed by friends and stranger alike, and I fully expect there are pictures of me cupping Little Angry and McSquirter Twins all over the Internet as I type.  But then, by allowing her to have my underpants I had allowed her to get a free bottle of warm Asti Spumante.  More than that, I had helped a young girl realise a dream, a dream of not being last.  For once, she was a winner.  And I played a full, and indeed pantless selfless part in that victory.  For that I ask no thanks or congratulations.  The look on her face with my pants on her head was reward enough.

As for the most selfish thing I have ever done, well I can say with utter certainty that I have never, ever, given anyone my last Rolo.

Comments

[Big Blogger]

I can't speak for anyone else, but you're definitely my hero.

[SpanishGoth]

And she was pleased with Y-fronts? Must have been very dark. Might have taken some explaining to her boyfriend later. No way I would have done it though - probably why I avoid hen nights like they're the bubonic plague.

As for Rolos, let them buy their own

[little bugger]

Oh I'm off to look for the pics! :)

[Angelalala]

I like this post.

The recycling part, mainly. Bottle bank bitch that I am.

[Mr Angry]

Angelalala - I did check it was allowed! And I did have to rewrite it from a slightly different angle, but yes, the episode itself has been written about before... booo!

[swishmaximage icons]

Bravo, what necessary phrase..., a brilliant idea

P.S. Please review our icons for Windows 8