Right, well.
I'm utterly speechless. Clare's song has rendered Big Blogger completely mute.
This has never happened before.
To get around the problem I'm using a Stephen Hawking-type contraption to pen this using only the power of my mind, and it's pretty bloody good. Resting my mouth is allowing vital energy to course through parts of my body that haven't been coursed through before, and ooh! it's giving me the willies.
Good willies, but willies nonetheless.
I've still got a sore head (and unmentionables) from the party the other night. Big Blogger might be all-knowing and all-seeing but that doesn't mean that he's immune to the dreaded hangover. He's also not immune to the charms of Eastern Europeans. Say no more. Not that anything happened of course, because I'm a disembodied head with incredible charisma and they're not. But anyway.
The eviction poll will be up in the sidebar asap, so get voting for who you want me stick in the gunge tank. No, wait, I'm getting myself confused with Noel Edmonds.
Vote for who you want me to evict. Not stay. Don't vote for who you want to stay. If you do that then you're thick.
Oh, and for doing That Song, Clare is completely immune from eviction this week, so she won't even be on the poll. See? You put in the effort and you get rewarded. That'll be a lesson to the rest of you.
And so, to Task Four.
I'm going to be slightly more conventional with this one, you'll be happy to hear.
"Big Blogger would like each housemate to describe the most selfless thing they've ever done, and the most selfish. Please write about your motives, or lack of them, and any context for and/or repurcussions for you or others because of your actions.
The deadline for this task is Friday at midnight"
So off you go, have a think, and if anyone needs any pads of paper, felt-tip pens and copydex just give me a shout.
I'm nipping to Superdrug for some Paramol.
BB
The most shellfish? Well, there was that oyster bar in New Orleans back in the eighties ....
Posted by: bob | Tuesday, 12 June 2007 at 22:36
Could you get some king size rizzla please BB. I appear to be running short since we ran low on toilet roll and Mr Angry decided this situation called for drastic measures.
Posted by: bedshaped | Tuesday, 12 June 2007 at 22:37
Oh dear. I am selfish to the very core.
Posted by: Cat | Tuesday, 12 June 2007 at 22:58
Cat - how can you say that? You were so giving at the party...
Posted by: penfold | Tuesday, 12 June 2007 at 23:04
Penfold! What did Cat give you at the party? And I thought it was only me, under the sink...
[runs away sobbing]
[comes back again]
Thanks for the stay of eviction, by the way. Woo, and hoo, and all that.
Oh, and I wish I'd thought of rizla as toilet roll. Might have saved us a slice of bread or two if I had. And, um, not sure if I've ever done anything truly selfless, or how on earth to choose from the many selfish things...
(and how come I'm just as worried about my selfish things not being selfish enough as I am about my selfless things being too selfish? Hardly seems fair)
Posted by: Clare | Tuesday, 12 June 2007 at 23:47
BANG BANG BANG
Hungover? Fucking amateur
Posted by: SpanishGoth | Wednesday, 13 June 2007 at 04:03
and B, I have loads of Rizzla papers - help yourself but, can I show you how to paste them together? Then you can create a BIG one.. if I knew, or had done *goes back to the darkest corner*
Posted by: SpanishGoth | Wednesday, 13 June 2007 at 04:07
And... how the fuck can you go to Superdrug at 22.20? Oh yeah - with a brick
Posted by: SpanishGoth | Wednesday, 13 June 2007 at 04:42
* Goes off to look up selfless in the dictionary *
These selfish acts you speak of, what if we are, err, incriminating ourselves by divulging them...?
* Laughs uncontrollably at definition of selfless *
Posted by: Mr Angry | Wednesday, 13 June 2007 at 09:40
I once performed a very selfish act with some Chenin Blanc and Marmite.
Anyone smuggled any of the fookin' stuff in yet?
And, incidentally, the girlfriend has taken over my blog and is revealing all sorts of sordid stuff. What can a man do, locked in here?
And who agreed that I'd enter this bloody Blogger thing, anyway, hey?
Er. Ah...
Posted by: Tippler | Wednesday, 13 June 2007 at 10:59
Speechless, and blind, it would seem Big Blogger.
Honestly, do I have get my tits out to get noticed around here? ;)
Posted by: little bugger | Wednesday, 13 June 2007 at 17:32
Nice rack.
Posted by: bob | Wednesday, 13 June 2007 at 17:54
Indeed!
Posted by: Clare | Wednesday, 13 June 2007 at 23:46
Grrr...
Posted by: penfold | Thursday, 14 June 2007 at 12:06
Fuckity fuckfilms! I've just realised I'm gonna be late on this task cos of all the thinking it required (and daft comments I've been tied up with) butt! (and it's a rather handsome butt if I say so myself), I reckon I deserve a pass being as I posted the last one exactly on deadline (what a fucking fab fluke that was!)
I'll do it now, BB, honest! I even promise not to use parentheses just purleeeease don't punish me for being a tardy tart!
Posted by: Angelalala | Saturday, 16 June 2007 at 00:29
Oh, alright then.
You've caught me on a good day.
Posted by: Big Blogger | Saturday, 16 June 2007 at 00:34
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