Big Blogger 2007: How not to become a WAG

Wednesday, 20 June 2007

How not to become a WAG

Back when I lived in East London I was somewhat of an, er, aggressive driver. I had a busy, on-the-road job and three bin-lids to ferry about so my natural tendency to be nice to people disappeared as soon as I put the key in my cheap runabout.

Which is why, when sitting in hideous traffic at a notoriously busy Upton Park junction, I edged forward all of half an inch to let the BMW driver trying to get into my lane know I wasn't having it. Nice car, mate but I have places to be too. He waved. Edged an inch himself. Cheeky bugger! I ignored him. The boys were all arms and legs in the back

'Mum! Mum!'

'Shush, boys' I replied 'Mummy's driving and I don't care how nice his car is, this prat is not pushing in'

'But, Muuuum!'

He winked. I rolled my eyes at his total front. Edged another half inch, worked out that I'd finally get across the junction on this lights change - as long as he didn't nip in front.

'Boys! Quiet!' Steely determination steadied my left foot exactly on the biting point of my clutch.

The lights changed, I pulled off in triumph and heard a clunk behind me. Sitting in the traffic on the other side of the lights I glanced in the rear view mirror to see Mr Cheeky BMW driver and the fella in the car behind him pointing at where their bumpers had said hello to each other.

'Hah! If he was concentrating he'd have known that fella behind was too close. See, boys? Having a nice car doesn't make you right all the time'

Babyboy says 'But Mum, that was Ian Wright! And he waved at me!'

No 1 Son says 'And I think that bash was your fault'

They've put a statue there now but I don't think I had anything to do with that.

Posted by Angela Marshall at 12:53 | Permalink

Comments

The only footballer I would know is David Beckham, if that makes you feel any better...

Posted by: Cat | Wednesday, 20 June 2007 at 18:14

Who cares who he was? Well done you for keeping your place!

Posted by: Clare | Monday, 25 June 2007 at 14:51

The comments to this entry are closed.

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Welcome to the home of Big Blogger 2007. For the next eight weeks or so we will be watching (well, reading) the housemates as they complete their tasks, eake out a meagre existence, and do everything in their power to convince you, the blogging public, that they should be the ones to win the title of Big Blogger 2007. Who will win? You decide...
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A Concise History

Click the links to go straight to each task and/or each particular housemate's downright ludicrous response:

Task 1: The Task, Clare (1)/(2), Joseph, Bob, Spanish Goth, Enidd, Cat, Invader Stu, Penfold, Tippler, Katy, bedshaped, Mr Angry, Ariel, Angelalala, Neil.

Task 2: The Task, Spanish Goth, Cat, Joseph, Enidd, Bob, Tippler, Invader Stu, Ariel, Penfold, Mr Angry, Katy, Neil, Angelalala, bedshaped, Clare.

Task 3: The Task, Penfold, Cat, Bob, Angelalala, Tippler (1)/(2), Spanish Goth, Invader Stu, Joseph, bedshaped, Mr Angry, Neil, Clare.

Task 4: The Task, Cat, Spanish Goth, Clare, Tippler (1)/(2), Invader Stu, Mr Angry, Joseph, Penfold, bedshaped, Bob, Neil, Angelalala.

Task 5: The Task, Clare, Spanish Goth, Cat, Joseph, Penfold, Angelalala, Tippler (1)/(2), Bob, Mr Angry, bedshaped, Ordinary Girl, Non-working monkey.

Task 6: The Task, Spanish Goth (1)/(2), Bob, Joseph, Non-working monkey (1)/(2), Penfold, Cat, Tippler, Ordinary Girl, bedshaped, Angelalala, Mr Angry, Clare.

Task 7: The Task, Angelalala, Clare, Cat, Joseph, Penfold, Bob, Spanish Goth, Tippler, bedshaped, Ordinary Girl, Mr Angry.

Task 8: The Task, Tippler, Cat, Bob, Clare (1)/(2), Penfold, bedshaped, Big Blogger, Mr Angry, Joseph, Angelalala.

Task 9: The Task, Penfold, Bob, Cat, Big Blogger, bedshaped, Tippler, Angelalala, Joseph, Clare.

Task 10: The Task, bedshaped (1) / (2) / (3) / (4) / (5) / (6) / (7), Clare (1a / b) / (2) / (3) / (4) / (5) / (6) / (7), Tippler (1) / (2) / (3) / (4) / (5), Cat (1) / (2) / (3) / (4), Bob (1) / (2) / (3) / (4) / (5) / (6), Penfold (1) / (2) / (3) / (4) / (5) / (6) / (7), Joseph (1) / (2), Angelalala

Task 11: The Task, Clare, Cat, Tippler, Penfold, Angelalala, bedshaped, Bob.

Task 12: The Task, Tippler, Cat, Penfold (1)/(2), Clare, Angelalala, Bob, bedshaped.

Task 13: The Task, Bob, Tippler, Cat, Angelalala.

Task 14: The Final Task, Tippler (1)/(2)/(3), Cat (1)/(2)/(3), Bob (1)/(2)/(3).

A Not Very Concise At All History

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